Advice for dating a widower
It is a journey, but I think every relationship is a journey and worth it for love with the right person. Not right now, I'm still raw from that overwhelming experience.
One of the things you will be awake to is your date’s grief. However, you should be aware that he may be very rigid when it comes to talking about his grief.
But I also feel like maybe he’s not ready and i don’t want to be a rebound. In this particular case: he's probably still in love with his wife.
That doesn't mean he doesn't want to/can't develop feelings for someone else, but you need to be prepared for the fact that she will be a part of his life forever, and especially since its been so recently, a big part.
this is not the same but I lost my father and I can understand how it is to lose someone that you love dearly. This is going to be a journey but I’m going to try to make it work. Find out what days are sad for him (her birthday, her death day, anniversary) and ask him what he does on those days. The widower would get grief stricken on these days and these days were, dissapointingly, never the same for her again.
I just want to not run away because I don’t know how to navigate this situation due to a lack of experience. As far as being intimate, it may lead to bouts of grief and tears.
In place of that, here I was, a stranger, an outsider entering their lives while the pain was still raw.
He can have another girlfriend/wife, but their family member is gone forever.
The reality is, there aren't many who can stomach all of this, other than perhaps others who have lost a spouse.
I think you should give it a chance as it sounds like you guys get on great. The important thing here is that you communicate your feelings and worries about the issue to him.
While I feel sorry for his loss, I would not want my relationship to be overshadowed by the loss of his wife or the love they shared. What they had was beautiful and the loss is tragic, I feel deeply sorry for him and I wish the situation was simple for you, but he has to be in the right frame of mind to engage in another relationship. I think the main thing you both need to do is communicate.
I feel like if I knew the details then I wouldn’t have let this develop the way it has.
I am very attracted to him and the feelings seem mutual.
I just don’t know if I should let him down easy or see how things go...